I miss..

..so much

As i sit here with the sound of the rain falling softly in the background, i smell the incense burning and i watch the candle flickering in the breeze, the blue hue of the christmas lights bathes the balcony and i hear the soft ticking sound of the keys below my finger tips as i type this out black and white on my screen.

Still with all this beauty and peace around me, i miss so much..

i want to share with you my words, my thoughts, my laughter, my heartache, my songs, my recipes, my hopes, my wishes, my regrets, my joy, my sorrow, my love, my hugs, my memories…

just 5 more min with you..

just to tell you how much i love you, to tell you i am sorry, to tell you i am proud of you, to tell you how much you mean to me, to tell you how grateful i am to you, to tell you how much i miss you, to tell you how every day i think of you and hold you in my heart…

and still all of that would be nothing if i couldn’t just see your eyes, your smile, hear you tell me you love me, feel you hug me one more time, just to drink a cup of tea you made with your hands for me.. any one little moment i could have.. even just one minute.. 60 whole seconds to see you before me and to know that you love me and to feel it for eternity…

there will never ever ever be a day when i dont miss you.

i love you daddy.

i always will.