How can one even begin to explain the depth of this word.

If feels like a bottomless pit..

They say only time can heal the pain

There is no real healing i believe, just a dulling.

Maybe we start to feel better when the nightmares stop, when the pleading with G-d ends, when the anger and the frustration and the visualization of your heart broken in a thousand pieces and scattered on the floor like so many pieces of a candy apple stops being in the forefront of your mind..


I know that all the years of work i have done for others as a medium can still not in anyway prepare me for the enormity of my pain.

Maybe writing in this blog about it will help me, will help others who feel alone or not understood in their feelings..  Maybe reading this will help those who don’t want to talk about it anymore, but want to know that there is someone else out there who understands and that it is normal to go through the process in whatever steps and ways they need too.


We’ll see how it all goes..

Sending you all love and light

And to all those we have lost

May you find your way home.


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